Unarmed Truth and Unconditional Love
“I believe that unarmed truth and unconditional love will have the final word in reality. This is why right, temporarily defeated, is stronger than evil triumphant.” ~ Martin Luther King, Jr.
Over the last several months, I have been deeply considering what is mine to do – how I can best use the gifts, passions, and experiences I have been blessed with to make a positive contribution to our world. Indeed, Open Heart Consulting grew out of this reflection and continues to be informed by it.
One of the incredible wonders of life is that we are each unique individuals AND we are interconnected, part of one sacred whole. This calls us to consider deeply how we can give full expression to our uniqueness in service to the whole. And I believe this is especially important now as our species wrestles with so many crises.
This is where my reflections are leading me: We may all be part of a sacred whole, but the threads connecting us have become entangled and blocked. The blood in a blocked artery cannot flow. Likewise, love is not flowing freely through the treads of our humanity. For me, untangling those threads and dissolving the blockages is of primary importance in my life’s work. This entails balancing what Martin Luther King referred to as “unarmed truth and unconditional love.”
“Unarmed truth” is the willingness to speak clearly and authentically about what we see/experience and the impact it has on our world. Notice that this is truth that is unarmed. It is not used as a weapon to attack and demonize others. “Unarmed truth” speaks to behaviors that are unacceptable while respecting the humanity of the other person. It recognizes that all of us are more than our worst acts, and calls people to look deeply at the repercussions of their choices and behaviors. “Unarmed truth” also invites us to recognize that human interactions are complex and interdependent, which means we need to consider the contributions we make to any disconnect that occurs.
It is my belief that “unarmed truth” cannot exist without “unconditional love” – they are interdependent. Love is tender, honoring, kind… and can sometimes be viewed as weak and permissive. I would disagree. I would say that love is incredibly strong and powerful. Love calls us higher and inviting someone to look at the impact of their behavior is an act of love. To do so, recognizes the potential of the other person. It sees the possibility in the other person.
“Ah,” you might say, “but look at what this person has done. How can I love them?” It is important to remember that we are not asked to love people’s behaviors. We are asked to see the inherent worth in each person, to separate their personhood from their actions, and to see possibilities in them that they may not see in themselves. “Unconditional love” is focused on personhood, not actions. Such love is transformative – for both the other person and ourselves. It moves us beneath the surface where we are all one. Beneath the surface, there is no other – the other is us.
Embracing “unarmed truth and conditional love” is not easy. I struggle with the balance every day. And I would say that living with that struggle is a place I want to be. It continually calls me to reflect on how I show up and to engage the dance of relationship from the highest and best place in myself. Amid the unkindness and incivility I see around me, I believe the practice of “unconditional love” is purposeful action that makes a difference. It untangles the threads and dissolves blockages that keep us from living inside the truth of our common wholeness.